In a stunning display of competency, the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences actually managed to correct a long-standing error last year by finally awarding Jon Hamm with the Primetime Emmy for Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series for his work on Mad Men. Dare I allow myself to believe they're capable of recognizing more overshadowed greatness this year and nominate some real dark horses instead of giving the same people a fifth or sixth trophy? Nonetheless, today I get to have my say in what shows, performances, scripts, and what have you should be held up as television's best. The correct list of nominees, with some picks that no doubt were entirely ignored during the last two weeks of voting, after the jump. (Look, I love ya Mark McKinney, but there's just no way.)
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series
Louie Anderson for playing Christine Baskets on Baskets (FX)
Noah Galvin for playing Kenny O'Neal on The Real O'Neals (ABC)
Pete Gardner for playing Darryl Whitefeather on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (The CW)
David Alan Grier for playing Joe Carmichael on The Carmichael Show (NBC)
Daniel Levy for playing David Rose on Schitt's Creek (Pop)
Mark McKinney for playing Glenn Sturgis on Superstore (NBC)
Sam Richardson for playing Richard Splett on Veep (HBO)
My winner: Pete Gardner may look like a casting achievement only, given the part was inexplicably originally played by Mad TV alum Michael McDonald, but he is so, so terrific three-dimensionalizing a role that was pretty bare-bones tasteless in the pilot.
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series
Vanessa Bayer for playing various characters on Saturday Night Live (NBC)
Donna Lynne Champlin for playing Paula Proctor on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (The CW)
Loretta Devine for playing Cynthia Carmichael on The Carmichael Show (NBC)
Emily Hampshire for playing Stevie Budd on Schitt's Creek (Pop)
Debra Lawrance for playing Rose Thomas on Please Like Me (Pivot)
Noel Wells for playing Rachel on Master of None (Netflix)
My winner: Loretta Devine is a goddamn national treasure.
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series
Amy Brenneman for playing Laurie Garvey on The Leftovers (HBO)
Lea DeLaria for playing Carrie "Big Boo" Black on Orange is the New Black (Netflix)
Regina King for playing Erika Murphy on The Leftovers (HBO)
Rhea Seehorn for playing Kim Wexler on Better Call Saul (AMC)
Alison Wright for playing Martha Hanson on The Americans (FX)
Constance Zimmer for playing Quinn King on UnREAL (Lifetime)
My winner: Regina King already has an Emmy and I'm a socialist, so I'd vote for Alison Wright for the sum total of her fantastic work.
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series
Alan Alda for playing Uncle Pete Wittel on Horace and Pete (LouisCK.net)
Clayne Crawford for playing Ted Talbot Jr. on Rectify (SundanceTV)
Noah Emmerich for playing Stan Beeman on The Americans (FX)
Michael McKean for playing Chuck McGill on Better Call Saul (AMC)
Richard Thomas for playing Frank Gaad on The Americans (FX)
Martin Wallstrom for playing Tyrell Wellick on Mr. Robot (USA)
My winner: Rewatching the first season of Mr. Robot somehow gave me even more appreciation for the unique mania Martin Wallstrom brings to Tyrell.
Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Limited Series or Movie
Sterling K. Brown for playing Christopher Darden on The People v. O.J. Simpson: American Crime Story (FX)
Connor Jessup for playing Taylor Blaine on American Crime (ABC)
Wendell Pierce for playing Clarence Thomas in Confirmation (HBO)
Joey Pollari for playing Eric Tanner on American Crime (ABC)
David Schwimmer for playing Robert Kardashian on The People v. O.J. Simpson: American Crime Story (FX)
Forrest Whitaker for playing Fiddler on Roots (History)
My winner: Among the People v. O.J. cast, Sterling K. Brown is second only to his partner on the prosecution.
Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Limited Series or Movie
Emily Bergl for playing Lilah Tanner on American Crime (ABC)
Grace Gummer for playing Ricki Seidman in Confirmation (HBO)
Catherine Keener for playing Mary Dorman on Show Me a Hero (HBO)
Melissa Leo for playing Lady Bird Johnson in All the Way (HBO)
Cristin Milioti for playing Betsy Solverson on Fargo (FX)
Jean Smart for playing Floyd Gerhardt on Fargo (FX)
My winner: Jean Smart, I guess. I mean who else?
Outstanding Lead Actress in a Limited Series or Movie
Kirsten Dunst for playing Peggy Blumquist on Fargo (FX)
Felicity Huffman for playing Leslie Graham on American Crime (ABC)
Riley Keough for playing Christine Reade on The Girlfriend Experience (Starz)
Sarah Paulson for playing Marcia Clark on The People v. O.J. Simpson: American Crime Story (FX)
Lili Taylor for playing Anne Blaine on American Crime (ABC)
Kerry Washington for playing Anita Hill in Confirmation (HBO)
My winner: Sarah Paulson, in no easy feat, managed to find a performance that would wash the stench of "Studio 60" off of her and actually get me to see her as a terrific actress in a worthwhile project.
Outstanding Lead Actor in a Limited Series or Movie
Bryan Cranston for playing President Lyndon B. Johnson in All the Way (HBO)
James Franco for playing Jake Epping on 11.22.63 (Hulu)
Timothy Hutton for playing Dan Sullivan on American Crime (ABC)
Oscar Isaac for playing Nick Wasicsko on Show Me a Hero (HBO)
Malachi Kirby for playing Kunta Kinte on Roots (History)
Courtney B. Vance for playing Johnnie Cochran on The People v. O.J. Simpson: American Crime Story (FX)
My winner: OS-CAR I-SAAC (clap clap clap-clap-clap)
Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series
Ava Acres for playing Young Rebecca Bunch in the "Josh Has No Idea Where I Am!" episode of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (The CW)
Danielle Brooks for playing Shannon in the "Indians on TV" episode of Master of None (Netflix)
Anna Camp for playing Deirdre Robespierre in the "Kimmy Goes on a Playdate!" episode of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (Netflix)
Gina Gallego for playing Mrs. Hernandez in the "Josh and I Are Good People!" episode of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (The CW)
Ariana Grande for playing various characters in the "Ariana Grande" episode of Saturday Night Live (NBC)
Annie Mumolo for playing Jill Kwatney-Adelman in the "No Friend Left Behind" episode of Lady Dynamite (Netflix)
My winner: I never would have thought Anna Camp had a performance like that in her
Outstanding Guest Actor in a Comedy Series
Christopher Abbott for playing Charlie Dattolo in "The Panic in Central Park" episode of Girls (HBO)
Fred Armisen for playing Robert Durst in the "Kimmy Goes Rollerskating!" episode of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (Netflix)
Deon Cole for playing Charlie Telphy in the "Charles in Charge" episode of black-ish (ABC)
Larry David for playing various characters in the "Larry David/The 1975" episode of Saturday Night Live (NBC)
Tracy Morgan for playing various characters in the "Tracy Morgan/Demi Lovato" episode of Saturday Night Live (NBC)
Bradley Whitford for playing Magnus Hirschfeld in the "Oscillate" episode of Transparent (Amazon)
My winner: It's really tempting to vote for Deon Cole but I'm going with Tracy Morgan instead, because that SNL episode is a beautiful welcome home for him
Outstanding Guest Actor in a Drama Series
Richard Armitage for playing Francis Dolarhyde in "The Great Red Dragon" episode of Hannibal (NBC)
Christopher McDonald for playing Judge Don Schakowsky in the "Bond" episode of The Good Wife (CBS)
Denis O'Hare for playing Judge Charles Abernathy in the "Shoot" episode of The Good Wife (CBS)
Clarke Peters for playing Det. Oscar Clemons in the "AKA Sin Bin" episode of Marvel's Jessica Jones (Netflix)
Blair Underwood for playing Harry Dargis in the "Shoot" episode of The Good Wife (CBS)
BD Wong for playing Whiterose in the "eps1.7_wh1ter0se.m4v" episode of Mr. Robot (USA)
My winner: BD Wong, who almost literally disappeared into the character in an unrecognizable performance. Also, lol at this category: so barren and underwhelming that I nominated TWO "Good Wife" judges.
Outstanding Guest Actress in a Drama Series
Aidy Bryant for playing Alice Wittel in "Episode 2" of Horace and Pete (LouisCK.net)
Natasha Lyonne for playing Nicky Nichols in the "Empathy is a Boner Killer" episode of Orange is the New Black (Netflix)
Annet Mahendru for playing Nina Krilova in the "Pastor Tim" episode of The Americans (FX)
Laurie Metcalf for playing Sarah Wittel in "Episode 3" of Horace and Pete (LouisCK.net)
Sarah Steele for playing Marissa Gold in the "Unmanned" episode of The Good Wife (CBS)
Lorraine Toussaint for playing Dana Adams in the "More than Words" episode of The Fosters (Freeform)
My winner: Laurie Metcalf, my God does she own that entire third episode.
Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series
Shiri Appleby for playing Rachel Goldberg on UnREAL (Lifetime)
Kerry Bishé for playing Donna Clark on Halt and Catch Fire (AMC)
Carrie Coon for playing Nora Durst on The Leftovers (HBO)
Mackenzie Davis for playing Cameron Howe on Halt and Catch Fire (AMC)
Taraji P. Henson for playing Cookie Lyon on Empire (Fox)
Keri Russell for playing Elizabeth Jennings on The Americans (FX)
My winner: Kerry Bishé became the improbable breakout star of Halt and Catch Fire and we are better for having her on our television sets.
Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series
Steve Buscemi for playing Pete Wittel on Horace and Pete (LouisCK.net)
Louis C.K. for playing Horace Wittel on Horace and Pete (LouisCK.net)
Rami Malek for playing Elliot Alderson on Mr. Robot (USA)
Scoot McNairy for playing Gordon Clark on Halt and Catch Fire (AMC)
Matthew Rhys for playing Philip Jennings on The Americans (FX)
Aden Young for playing Daniel Holden on Rectify (SundanceTV)
My winner: I'm just gonna keep praising Matthew Rhys until the Academy actually wises up and reverses this embarrassing black mark. It was tempting to vote for Malek though
Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series
Anthony Anderson for playing Andre Johnson on black-ish (ABC)
Jerrod Carmichael for playing Jerrod Carmichael on The Carmichael Show (NBC)
Andy Daly for playing Forrest Macneil on Review with Forrest Macneil (Comedy Central)
Tommy Dewey for playing Alex Cole on Casual (Hulu)
Chris Geere for playing Jimmy Shive-Overly on You're the Worst (FXX)
Randall Park for playing Louis Huang on Fresh Off the Boat (ABC)
Jeffrey Tambor for playing Maura Pfefferman on Transparent (Amazon)
Josh Thomas for playing Josh Thomas on Please Like Me (Pivot)
My winner: Last year, I dismissed his nomination as a B+ performance purely in for name recognition. This year, Anthony Anderson is my winner. And if you watch black-ish, you know why.
Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series
Maria Bamford for playing Maria Bamford on Lady Dynamite (Netflix)
Rachel Bloom for playing Rebecca Bunch on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (The CW)
Aya Cash for playing Gretchen Cutler on You're the Worst (FXX)
Tracee Ellis Ross for playing Rainbow Johnson on black-ish (ABC)
Michaela Watkins for playing Valerie Meyers on Casual (Hulu)
Constance Wu for playing Jessica Huang on Fresh Off the Boat (ABC)
My winner: This category is overflowing with riches and yet again and again I come back to Aya Cash, so fearless in how she embraced portraying the ugliness of Gretchen's clinical depression.
Outstanding Writing for a Comedy Series
Kenya Barris for the "Hope" episode of black-ish (ABC)
Jerrod Carmichael and Mike Scully for the "Fallen Heroes" episode of The Carmichael Show (NBC)
Liz Tigelaar for the "Biden" episode of Casual (Hulu)
Rachel Bloom and Aline Brosh McKenna for the "Josh Just Happens to Live Here!" episode of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (The CW)
Aziz Ansari and Alan Yang for the "Parents" episode of Master of None (Netflix)
Ali Liebegott for the "Man on the Land" episode of Transparent (Amazon)
My winner: Kenya Barris. Seriously, I can't say enough good things about "Hope" as an episode of television. Also is this where I can progress-brag about the fact that I only nominated one white dude among a category of nine people? Women and people of colour are writing some damn good television and more opportunities need to head their way.
Outstanding Directing for a Drama Series
Matthew Rhys for "The Magic of David Copperfield V: The Statue of Liberty Disappears" episode of The Americans (FX)
Peter Gould for the "Nailed" episode of Better Call Saul (AMC)
Kimberly Peirce for the "Play with Friends" episode of Halt and Catch Fire (AMC)
Louis C.K. for "Episode 10" of Horace and Pete (LouisCK.net)
Craig Zobel for the "International Assassin" episode of The Leftovers (HBO)
Tricia Brock for the "eps1.8_m1rr0r1ng.qt" episode of Mr. Robot (USA)
My winner: It's difficult enough for a TV director to effectively take us into the world of a television show. Now imagine a director being tasked with taking you into an entirely different world that defies reality, humanism, and the laws of physics. Yeah, Craig Zobel.
Outstanding Writing for a Limited Series, Movie, or Dramatic Special
Robert Schenkkan for All the Way (HBO)
John Ridley for "Episode Seven" of American Crime (ABC)
Susannah Grant for Confirmation (HBO)
Lodge Kerrigan and Amy Seimetz for The Girlfriend Experience (Starz)
D.V. DiVincentis for the "Marcia, Marcia, Marcia" episode of The People v. O.J. Simpson: American Crime Story (FX)
William F. Zorzi and David Simon for "Part 6" of Show Me a Hero (HBO)
My winner: D.V. DiVincentis for the definitive People v. O.J. episode.
Outstanding Directing for a Limited Series, Movie, or Dramatic Special
Kimberly Peirce for "Episode Eight" of American Crime (ABC)
Rick Famuyima for Confirmation (HBO)
James Strong for "The Day in Question" episode of 11.22.63 (Hulu)
Amy Seimetz for the "Blindsided" episode of The Girlfriend Experience (Starz)
John Singleton for "The Race Card" episode of The People v. O.J. Simpson: American Crime Story (FX)
Philip Noyce for "Night One" of Roots (History)
My winner: Kimberly Peirce is given the difficult assignment of blending the resolution to an enormously emotionally, impactful cliffhanger from the previous episode with real-life interviews of gun violence victims, and she succeeds.
Outstanding Directing for a Comedy Series
Beth McCarthy-Miller for the "Hope" episode of black-ish (ABC)
Todd Biermann for the "2016" episode of Broad City (Comedy Central)
Gerry Cohen for the "Protest" episode of The Carmichael Show (NBC)
Marc Webb for the "Josh Just Happens to Live Here!" episode of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (The CW)
Matthew Savile for the "Trifle" episode of Please Like Me (Pivot)
Martin Jr. A. Pasetta for the "A Puppet Walks Into A Bar" episode of Undateable (NBC)
My winner: The Crazy Ex-Girlfriend pilot is a stunning direction achievement, particularly in its opening musical number. Marc Webb.
Outstanding Writing for a Drama Series
Joel Fields and Joe Weisberg for the "Persona Non Grata" episode of The Americans (FX)
Heather Marion and Vince Gilligan for the "Klick" episode of Better Call Saul (AMC)
Dhavi Waller for the "Play with Friends" episode of Halt and Catch Fire (AMC)
Louis C.K. for "Episode 3" of Horace and Pete (LouisCK.net)
Damon Lindelof and Nick Cuse for the "International Assassin" episode of The Leftovers (HBO)
Sarah Gertrude Shapiro for the "Truth" episode of UnREAL (Lifetime)
My winner: Dhavi Waller for the best Halt episode yet.
Outstanding Limited Series
11.22.63 (Hulu)
American Crime (ABC)
Fargo (FX)
The Girlfriend Experience (Starz)
The People v. O.J. Simpson: American Crime Story (FX)
Roots (History)
Show Me a Hero (HBO)
My winner: With only a couple notable exceptions, The People v. O.J. Simpson remains the television achievement of 2016.
Outstanding Television Movie
7 Days in Hell (HBO)
All the Way (HBO)
Confirmation (HBO)
A Deadly Adoption (Lifetime)
Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No (Syfy)
A Very Murray Christmas (Netflix)
My winner: Confirmation. Try to pinpoint where in this category I stopped nominating things seriously. I bet it isn't hard to tell!
Outstanding Main Title Design
11.22.63 (Hulu)
Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (The CW)
F is for Family (Netflix)
Lady Dynamite (Netflix)
The Late Show with Stephen Colbert (CBS)
The Leftovers (HBO)
My winner: A category I include every year just for fun! The unequivocal winner for me this year goes to the show whose main title sequence perfectly encapsulates the thematic undercurrent of the show: F is for Family.
Outstanding Reality Competition Program
Chopped (Food Network)
Face Off (SyFy)
Last Comic Standing (NBC)
Masterchef Junior (Fox)
RuPaul's Drag Race (Logo)
Top Chef (Bravo)
My winner: You know what, I really dug the last season of Last Comic Standing. Sure, the show can never decide whether it likes a structure of challenges and "I know I'm funnier than _____" showdowns or just head-to-head stand-up battles all the way to the end. But the judging panel was well balanced, with Roseanne Barr as the Randy, Keenan Ivory Wayans as the Paula and Norm Macdonald as something approaching a nitpicky Simon. And the show actually found a lot of decent, diverse up-and-coming talent. Just ignore that all of those people were pushed out in early rounds in favour of a pretty terrible final five!
Outstanding Host for a Reality or Reality Competition Program
W. Kamau Bell for hosting United Shades of America (CNN)
RuPaul Charles for hosting RuPaul's Drag Race (Logo)
Cat Deeley for hosting So You Think You Can Dance (Fox)
Anthony Jeselnik for hosting Last Comic Standing (NBC)
Gordon Ramsay for hosting Masterchef Junior (Fox)
McKenzie Westmore for hosting Face Off (Syfy)
My winner: And speaking of Last Comic Standing figuring its shit out last year, an enormous part of its creative resurgence can be attributed to Anthony Jeselnik, who brought the perfect amount of dry, sarcastic and disinterested humour to the proceedings.
Outstanding Variety Special
Demetri Martin: Live (At The Time) (Netflix)
Hannibal Buress: Comedy Comisado (Netflix)
John Mulaney: The Comeback Kid (Netflix)
Lemonade (HBO)
Tig Notaro: Boyish Girl Interrupted (HBO)
Triumph's Election Special 2016 (Hulu)
My winner: I never seriously considered picking the Hannibal Buress special purely on "I was there" bias. It also would have been easy to pick the riotously funny John Mulaney special. But Boyish Girl Interrupted is also freaking hilarious, and come on, Notaro does the entire back half of the show topless exposing her mastectomy scars. Nothing else can be the winner here.
Outstanding Variety Talk Series
The Daily Show with Trevor Noah (Comedy Central)
Full Frontal with Samantha Bee (TBS)
Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)
The Late, Late Show with James Corden (CBS)
Late Night with Seth Meyers (NBC)
The Nightly Show with Larry Wilmore (Comedy Central)
My winner: Full Frontal with Samantha Bee and then an enormous gap until the show that comes in second.
Outstanding Variety Sketch Series
Billy On the Street (TruTV)
Inside Amy Schumer (Comedy Central)
Key and Peele (Comedy Central)
Nathan For You (Comedy Central)
Saturday Night Live (NBC)
W/Bob and David (Netflix)
My winner: Nathan For You continues to build and build and build and build, and you can't possibly imagine he can top an episode like "Smokers Allowed" or the tightrope walking stunt. But you just wait, he'll find a way to do it in season four.
Outstanding Animated Program
Bob's Burgers (Fox)
BoJack Horseman (Netflix)
F is For Family (Netflix)
Rick and Morty (Adult Swim)
The Simpsons (Fox)
South Park (Comedy Central)
My winner: BoJack Horseman, because it's a silly show about a cartoon talking horse and also one of television's two best depictions of a person suffering from depression (the other features characters who regularly partake in a beverage known as trash juice).
Outstanding Comedy Series
black-ish (ABC)
The Carmichael Show (NBC)
Casual (Hulu)
Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (The CW)
Fresh Off the Boat (ABC)
Lady Dynamite (Netflix)
Master of None (Netflix)
Please Like Me (Pivot)
Review with Forrest Macneil (Comedy Central)
You're the Worst (FXX)
My winner: black-ish is hilarious, relevant, looks fantastic, sounds fantastic, and just about everything else that makes a show a no-brainer choice for a series that is "outstanding".
Outstanding Drama Series
The Americans (FX)
Better Call Saul (AMC)
Halt and Catch Fire (AMC)
Hannibal (NBC)
Horace and Pete (LouisCK.net)
The Leftovers (HBO)
Mr. Robot (USA)
Orange is the New Black (Netflix)
Rectify (SundanceTV)
UnREAL (Lifetime)
My winner: The Americans, once again, is the best available show in the category, edging out a stellar debut for Mr. Robot.
The nominations for the 68th Primetime Emmy Awards will almost certainly make me very, very angry tomorrow morning, Thursday, July 14, at 11:30am EDT.
